May 11, 2013 § 4 Comments
The new cafe is coming soon. While the movers start bringing in old furniture, i sink into a reminiscence phase. The benches are familiar comforts. They hold much more than just for sitting. There were cigarette stains, dog fur balls, and tainted paint. They hold conversations, some important, some futile but mostly connections between people or strangers.
I guess there is a better time to write this but it’s 0134 and I have been up since 0715. It does not help that I only got a few hours of sleep before. I guess there is also a better topic to write about. Since this is a food blog but I have been squandering around, not indulging with food and reflecting more.
When we forget to stop and ponder about things that really matter. When we start to ignore the important. When we pay attention to details so small it is nothing in the big picture. When we get so caught up with being sharp, we get pushed to the edge. We become the inconceivable thoughts of the fragile, thinking that we are strong. When we face the unknown, we fall steadily like a soufflé left sitting a fragment of a second too long.
We lose the signs. We gain the twines.
In Brené Brown’s Daring Greatly, she spoke about vulnerabilities. How being vulnerable puts us in a shameful position, and we keep very quiet. We all have them. So the question is, then what is there to be shameful about?
“Shame is the fear of disconnection”.
A disconnection which makes us, again, susceptible to being criticized or judged. Knowingly, it is ourselves that put the preconceived notion before even acting.
But when we share these moments of silliness, these moments of hurt, or shame, it builds trust. It is putting the trust into other people’s hand and go, “Hey, I need help”. So often, others are happy just to listen, but more than often, they are happy to help.
Perhaps, that is why a soufflé is such a beautiful dessert.Its short moment of daintiness becomes vulnerable to time and and is always silently savoured when served on the table.
I had a breakdown moment after receiving some bad news. But a lovely friend lent me her shoulders and allow me to lean on. It is unusual for me to reach out. I cave in when bad things happen. In those short hours, I learnt how to put trust on the table again. This, I am grateful for. We had the best generra coffee, drew and read.
Congratulations Elodie for having the lovely piece published.
But to grow up is to accept vulnerability. To be alive is to be vulnerable.” Madeleine L’Engle